I have a lot on my plate as a student, writer and business owner. I find it almost impossible to find time to socialize and do things that I love outside of work. Between filling, filing and uploading paperwork, squeezing time in to study for tests, complete projects and learn the ins and outs of my business genre there is little time for even the bare necessities. Though I’ve always pondered the essentials—planning, coming up with short-term and long-term work goals and working towards them; I must admit for a long time I was lost in the bustle of things.
My mind tells me to work and my heart follows. I am passionate about what I do in every sense of the word. When I pick something up I feel obligated to finish it. To deny such responsibility would be a true shame and yet I find myself partaking in cycle of unending action. Immense duty calls for compromise. Something had to give so I stopped blogging. I stopped writing for clients who weren’t willing to pay my wages. I stopped getting involved in compromises that were unfruitful both short and long term. I stopped selling myself short.
Just recently, I began investing and saving the little extra money I do have for a better future for myself. The worst thing I can imagine is bringing children into the world with little to support them and no one to act as both aspiration and motivation for them. I often dabble with the almost irrational fear off not being ready if the man of my dreams finally comes along. Who will I be then and who am I now? To be honest, I don’t know.
One thing I do know is that I will get to the beautiful middle—the place I’ve always wanted to be and I will do it right.